Three weeks ago, JILL CAMPBELL MACKAY spoke to a wedding organiser about how to plan your wedding. Here she writes about two recent unions where everything, predictably, did not go according to plan
LIKE the funeral business, the wedding industry is one that has grown by serving vulnerable people during emotionally taxing times. It is now a multi-million pound business worldwide, offering a staggering array of products, services, and monthly publications. There is even elaborate software now available, allowing a bride to plan her wedding to the nth degree, which is described as powerful, comprehensive and easy to use, qualities that brides-to-be used to be intent on finding in their future spouses rather than their laptops.
Over the past few weeks, I have been able to get a peek at the raw, and often frightening, matrimonial underbelly while following two couples and their families as they planned their nuptials. The wedding dress worn by Bride A, which was made to order from a shop in Limassol, looked lovely and all the fittings had gone well, but ten minutes into the service the petticoat unleashed itself from the waistband and fell to the floor, then the stitching around the waist started to come apart, and the beading followed suit.
The £800 dress was eventually secured by the groom’s mother, who had the wit and wisdom to have in her bag a packet of large safety pins.
Two months prior, the flowers had been painstakingly discussed, debated and eventually it was settled on the type, colour and design. The day before the wedding, the florist went to collect the order only to find the colours were totally different to those ordered. And not only that, the amount allocated had been reduced by one hundred blooms.
A RELATIVE at wedding B, in a moment of madness, had decided that the surprise release of white doves would be appropriate. Alas, the poor, frightened things ended up circling the venue as they were totally disorientated after having been released from their boxes.
Bride B was your typical Bridezilla; she had planned to have perfection on her big day but it soon ballooned into obsession, with late night discussions on style of cake knives, quality of favours, correct tone of the dinner napkins, etc. Her father stumped up £2,500 for a lavish wedding cake to feed 500, the top tier of which was seen by all to slither down the table like a creamy Mount Etna only half an hour into the reception. The groom, whose sole task at any wedding is to turn up at the church sober and wearing trousers, had forgotten to remove the label extolling the suit as Pure Wool from the cuff of the left sleeve.
This was a wedding of such outrageous excess that one felt almost sorry for the in laws. By the end of the white envelope line up both sets of parents looked as if they had just ran the London marathon and Dad was probably hoping that the haul from the envelopes was going to at least pay for the cake.
Bride B in the end looked a lot like Toula in My Big Fat Greek Wedding. Bride A, meanwhile, played the classic card; understated and pretty. Her family had wanted an unusual but classy venue so they had gone for an open air nightclub on the beach front.
IT WAS clear that no matter what extreme level of planning has gone into making the wedding happen, the fact is that there is absolutely no guarantee that all will go well on the day. So for any brides-to-be, let’s look at the big ‘boo boo’ areas:
1. Check the stitching on the dresses, wear the dress for a time, sit down in it, walk in it: test drive it thoroughly but carefully.
2. Do not trust anyone – especially the wholesaler who promises you the world and its flowers. They will try to con you with tightly wrapped blooms that have been shipped in a week before hand and the petals will fall like snow upon contact.
3. Go to a reputable hairstylist, one you know and who knows your style. Bride A used the talented Savvas at Palas of Hair, and stylist Elli Kaizer took good care of the rest of the bridal party.
4. Prioritise then delegate tasks like distribution of the favours etc and rope in as many reliable helpers as possible to transport flowers from church, to line up, and then on to the dinner.
5. Don’t be pressured into buying into complete packages, usually the dressmaker will also have a relative who does the flowers and she will try to sign you up for this and often its not cost effective.
6. Take nothing for granted, check and double check so that the DJ does not play Sexual Healing as the bride and groom take to the dance floor.
7. Have a microphone for any speakers, most folk talk into their chests and are inaudible.
8. Be assured that you will never please all the guests. Relatives will always moan that there was no souvla despite the fact that the choice of food served was delicious.
9. You will be living in cloud cuckoo land if you truly believe all relatives will stick to seating plans, they don’t, they will sit where they choose and there’s zip you can do about it.
10. Don’t go into debt; the adjustments that come with starting married life are stressful enough. No matter how much you pay for your wedding it doesn’t mean a thing if your marriage isn’t conceived in real love and genuine respect for each other
