EVERYTHING happens in threes. Or at least it does for Craig and Maria Webster, whose lives changed irrevocably exactly four months and three days ago today.
On September 29, 2003 Maria was admitted to Nicosia’s Apollonion Clinic for a caesarean section in her 34th week of gestation. She was giving birth to triplets following successful in-vitro fertilisation nine months earlier.
Suddenly, within hours, the once childless couple were blessed with Paris, Simon and Scott.
But, although triplets are no longer that uncommon in Cyprus due to IVF treatment, this set is special. This is because only two embryos were transferred into Maria’s womb. However, instead of just giving birth to twins, one of the embryos split in half creating identical brothers Simon and Scott. Not only was this a first for the couple and their gynaecologist, it was a first for Cyprus as well.
When the boys were initially born, Craig had told the Sunday Mail he was “happy, happy, happy” to be the proud father of three newborn babies. Now, more than four months on, he still feels it’s “wonderful to be a dad” but admits it’s “overwhelming” to have three on the go at once.
Who can blame him though? Everyone knows that children are a handful, but can you imagine having to look after three who are all at the same developmental stage? Having three who cry at the same time? Three who want to eat at the same time? Three who need their nappy changed at the same time? Three who want a cuddle at the same time? Three who get sick at the same time? And three who teethe at the same time?
It gets even worse when you consider that there are only two parents and they only have one pair of hands each. “And don’t forget we’re also first-time parents so we don’t always know what to do. Like all parents, we make mistakes, but unlike others, we make mistakes in threes,” they joked.
Within moments of the birth, Craig and Maria came to the shock realisation that those carefree days and idle hours spent relaxing in front of the television had evaporated – lazy lie-ins now but a distant memory. As for romantic, intimate moments, well they haven’t had one of those since before Maria gave birth.
It’s also very expensive having three babies at once. It means £210 on nappies per month, £5-£6 on formula a day and £90 a kick on paediatrician visits if injections are due. It also means a lot of takeaway dinners because they don’t have time to cook between sterilising bottles, preparing milk, changing nappies, rocking one or the other to sleep, doing the laundry and ironing… And all this on one salary – Craig’s, who is a professor at the College of Tourism, where he is employed as a teacher and researcher. It goes without saying that Maria was forced to give up her job because she could hardly juggle three babies and a career at once, even if she does get a lot of help from her side of the family (Craig is from the US so his family are unable to get over often, although they were here for two months soon after their grandsons’ birth).
“It’s hard enough me trying to get to work,” said Craig, who admitted he’d had to take ‘sick leave’ on occasion to help out with the kids at home. “But, thankfully the college has been very understanding and supportive of the situation,” he added.
Unfortunately, the couple were not eligible for social insurance, as they had lived abroad the year before the children were conceived. Then, due to the pregnancy and possible related complications, Maria had been advised to stay at home until the birth and so also lost out on maternity leave. Fortunately, however, they are eligible for government child benefits and receive £100 a month, which “helps with two weeks worth of diapers,” said Craig.
Like all parents, the Websters can tell their boys apart. “They have different personalities, so you can just tell who is who,” they said. However, in case the relatives are over helping to baby-sit, the boys have nametags on their cots to avoid any confusion. They also have different coloured bottles and dummies. Paris’ are blue, Simon’s are red and Scott gets whatever colour is available after that.
In order to make life easier for themselves, Craig and Maria record the boys’ eating and toilet habits. This was how they were able to know Simon was constipated for four days at one point. “Otherwise, between all the feeding and nappy changing that goes on in a day you might not notice if one of them doesn’t go to the toilet for days,” explained Craig.
All babies are cute, but the Webster boys are simply adorable. Particularly Paris, who is the eldest and the chubbiest.
“They might be cute, but by 11pm when one starts screaming and then they all start – when you’ve already been up with them since 6am – you start to change you mind about cuteness,” Craig chuckled.
He added: “I’m looking forward to when they can start eating on their own. When they can sit up and hold their bottle or eat a cookie by themselves, I’ll be thrilled.” He is also looking forward to watching them grow up and having each other as playmates, and believes they will spend many happy hours entertaining themselves.
These days, however, it’s no fun. “I look in the mirror and stare in horror at my reflection wondering what has become of me,” said Maria, who looks fantastic despite her belief to the contrary.
In fact the last time she left the house was on January 10 when the infants had a doctor’s appointment. Other than that she stays at home because it’s too difficult getting the three of them organised for an outing when any number of things could rock the boat. “I’m not complaining though, because I look at these three and I feel such love,” she added.
Although Craig also loves his boys, he said: “I’m finding it hard enjoying being a dad, because just as you try and spend time and bond with one, another starts crying and you have to race off and check on him. At the moment, it’s just a lot of hard work and you miss out on the pleasure of just focusing on one child, because we are working on one-third of our manpower.”
Nevertheless he reckons they’re nearly over the worst of it. “Teething is going to be awful (they’ve started), but what more can they do to us now?” he asks naively. Maria, on the other hand, is more aware that they could all come down with the measles at the same time, giving the words ‘sleepless nights’ a whole new meaning.
Like all new parents, after trying to do it all themselves for the first few months, the couple have now accepted they need an extra pair of hands to help Maria with the babies and have set about arranging to employ a foreign housemaid. They also have someone come in to help clean the house sometimes because it’s hard enough running around after three kids, without worrying about swabbing floors and cleaning windows.
“Besides my family have lives of their own and I can’t keep relying on them to come and take time out to help me,” said Maria.
Nevertheless, at the end of the day, the question is: “Is it worth it? Is it worth not finding the time to eat a decent meal, having no intimate moments, not going out, not having any personal time?”
“Oh yes,” they reply in unison. “It’s definitely worth it. I’m so happy. Everything is perfect. I have three healthy babies,” said Maria. “We have this house full of love. We are so lucky, it’s amazing,” added Craig.
So what next? Any more youngsters on the horizon?
“Well I think twin girls would be nice,” said Craig, although the jury is still out on that one as far as Maria is concerned!
