Twenty per cent of people suffer from depression at some point in their lives, but the Black Dog raises its ugly head more often over the holidays. Jill Campbell Mackay reports
ONE in twenty people suffer from depression at any given time and it will affect half of women and a quarter of men at some point in their lives. And while Christmas is a joyous time for many, it can be bleak for anyone given to depression.
Graham, a 38-year-old travel representative, tried to describe how he feels when the Black Dog, as Winston Churchill a long time sufferer of depression called, returns to haunt him. “My depression is a form of total brain crash, a truly terrible feeling that literally takes over my mind, it then takes away from me any semblance of dignity, effectively depriving me of all feelings of pleasure or joy. I sometimes feel as if I am nose down in a pool of black water, alone, and utterly abandoned by everyone. I am always much more fearful at this time of the year and have to work really hard to make sure I don’t fall down this dark well of depression that’s always lying in wait for me.”
When first meeting Graham it is hard to believe that he is a long-term depressive; he’s the one who always seems to be the life and soul of the party yet he made a suicide attempt seven years ago, which occurred over the New Year period. “I was saved that time by good friends who had seen through my Bah Humbug festive routine – they weren’t in the least bit fooled and immediately knew I was sad, lonely and feeling totally wretched.
“They came in the nick of time and held me together until I got through that terrible time. Now I am on drugs to combat and control these awful mood swings, but regardless of the tablets I still loathe and genuinely fear the festive season as it seems to highlight all the elements that are missing from my life.”
Few among us can honestly say that there hasn’t been a time when we have felt doomed to a form of ghastly solitary confinement in our own body, unable to communicate debilitating depressed feelings. For many, this time of year is a harrowing time – not for them family, friends and fun-filled festivities but a period when depression is magnified, when looking back on the year fill’s ones heart with deep remorse and looking forward only brings a form of mini terror.
There’s also a terrific amount of pressure put on families in the build up to the festive season, more so these days. A decade ago you would be hard pressed to spot the odd Christmas tree in Cyprus’ shops and supermarkets, but now it’s a huge rollercoaster of a financial burden that is embraced by nearly all families, adding the strain of appearing to embrace the season.
We may have got a lot richer over the past decade but it has not made us any happier, almost the reverse, if one looks at the escalating rates of crime, obesity, alcoholism, drug taking and suicide within our society. We also seem to have become a more anxious and insecure race of people, something that was evident in the behaviour of a group of 15-year-olds I came across recently. They were on a school trip and their edgy anger was almost tangible as they hung sullenly around the tour bus. I asked the teacher how he copes with this simmering anger and contempt.
“We don’t really,” he confessed, “in fact, it’s getting more and more difficult to be a good teacher as you used to be fearless, forthright and caring, now, we are just fearful, not just for ourselves, but also for our students. Last week one of our pupils committed suicide because his father would not buy him a £20,000 car. How on earth can we cope with that sort of thing? The answer is we don’t, because we haven’t got the training.”
That teacher also agreed with the premise that as a community we have never been less at ease with ourselves, which raises the question, isn’t it time the government became less concerned with the GNP and made some effort to turn things round a bit, see if they can create measures within our communities to bring a bit of human happiness into our lives? That may well be stretching the bounds of credibility somewhat but, things are indeed serious if one listens to one pharmacist in Paphos who claims a 30 per cent increase on last year’s prescriptions for anti-depressants. He added: “I am now filling prescriptions for heavy-duty drugs to combat depression, something that has been on the increase for a few years now, but suddenly there has been a significant leap, especially since all the problems with the Cyprus stock market. I now feel more than ever before that there’s definatly something untoward happening to our citizens, almost like mass depression has taken hold as a national disease.”
Perhaps we should look to Budda for some assistance; one Buddhist concept is the idea of non attachment to outcome; you have a goal and know what you must to attain it, but, with the crucial difference that when you have done what must be done, you then totally let go. You don’t fret, don’t get upset, don’t obsess, whatever it is that you want may come your way, it may not. You have done only what you can.
What Buddhists know and what we should try and learn is that happiness is only to be found in the present, and you will notice those moments of happiness much more often when your mind and body are working together.
