How far one bad song can go
Last Saturday I had the urge to join the masses to watch the Eurovision Song Contest finals. Yes, I know it is an idiotic activity but I tend to give in to my urges. My grandmother used to say: “It is better to sin and afterwards regret than to regret that you have never sinned” and my life’s philosophy is based on the saying. I know that my self-indulgence means I will never be accepted as a member of Opus Dei but as far as I understand it, that is not something I should worry about. After The Da Vinci Code nobody wants to join them anyway. It is amazing what one badly-written book can achieve.
Anyway, back to the Eurovision. The day after I had succumbed to my urge to participate, I decided to carry out an internet search on the subject. At first, the results were standard – the Finnish rockers’ victory, British rapper’s disappointment, anti-globalisation porno blunder, Icelandic actress’ fake entry. Then the engine started spitting out much more entertaining items.
“Aggrieved Russians complain over results,” said the Japanese Mainichi. That had me intrigued. I thought the Russians were happy with second prize but no, they weren’t, just the opposite. They thought it was “the latest in a series of anti-Russian moves by Europeans”.
“I will never believe that the song by the Finnish group Lordi was better and stronger as a song than ours,” the paper quoted Yuri Aktsyuta, a top Russian music producer, as saying. “I think that Russia was the winner and the voting was a protest vote, to some extent.”
Russians were not the only ones who felt disliked and treated unfairly. The same went for Germans.
“Germans ask why Europe hates them,” announced Reuters quoting from papers like Bild and Sueddetsche Zeitung. “We got zero points from 27 different countries; Switzerland was the only country to give us even seven points; Why does everyone dislike us? We didn’t get any help from our neighbouring countries, unlike some of the other countries that did well.”
Then I found a column in the Journal of Turkish Weekly, whose author, although very lightly, expressed something similar, of course, well-known in our part of the continent. “This week was such a mess and yesterday night was the cr?me of the whole week,” he wrote. “The Eurovision song contest was a near-tragedy. Honestly, it was a tragedy. But there is good news and bad one. Good news is we just gave four points to Greece and they gave a miserable three points us. That means we are still enemies. Bad news is we gave 10 points to Armenia. Read it: Turkey has given 10 points to Armenia. What is happening? You lazy Turkish viewers, learn something from the holy Armenians, don’t you! No points to Turkey. That is the enemy spirit. Well done boys!”
There was also a comment in Britain’s Daily Telegraph that said a dispute over the Eurovision was the final reason for Montenegrins to decide on having a referendum on independence from Serbia (“These old allies, who fought together against Croats, Albanians and Nato, are on the point of rupture over their joint representative at the Eurovision Song Contest”); an article in a Russian paper praised the CIS countries for voting for each other (“Russia and Armenia exchanged a maximum score of 12 points, Ukraine granted Russia 12 points, whereas Russians scored a Ukrainian singer 10. Byelorussia scored Armenia 8, Ukraine — 10, and Russia the maximum — 12 points.”); and an analysis on how the Eurovision voting patterns could help to predict future economic alliances or condemn the existing political ones (“Russian success at Eurovision can convert for Yandex” but “the UK has been receiving fewer points after deciding to turn their back on Europe and follow the US into Iraq”).
Well, I must say I am pretty impressed. The Eurovision is kitschy, mediocre and in bad taste, but still can do more for or against unity than anything else. It doesn’t matter that the unity is local and Viking, Balkan or East Europe-oriented. The old Roman rule of Pane and Circenses works and it is being noticed.
In Athens, just after the Eurovision Grand Final, director of EBU TV Department Bjorn Erichsen, held a press conference during which he said that the EBU is currently in negotiations with American broadcaster NBC, regarding the creation of a US version of the contest. In addition, they are in negotiations with Canada, Australia, the Middle East and Africa regarding the creation of a Eurovision-type song contest in each of those regions.
“Perhaps one day we can create the first world contest including the winners from each region, but at this stage it’s just a dream for now,” Erichsen said. How touchy and clever. After all, you never know what one bad song contest can achieve or express.
