THEY have been slickly packaged as forward-looking 21st century politicians, so our presidential candidates and their campaign managers probably think they are above something as trivial as dabbling in the stars.
Luckily for the voters we are not, and neither were such famous world leaders as Ronald Reagan, Richard Nixon and Theodore Roosevelt. Winston Churchill also consulted an astrologer when he was facing off with Adolph Hitler, who himself had an unhealthy interest in the occult of the darkest kind.
Napoleon also liked to dabble in astrology, as well as Boris Yeltsin, Indira Gandhi and Fran?ois Mitterrand. Tony Blair’s wife Cherie practically had a live-in seer, although it might have been better for the world had the woman been fired sooner.
Whether or not astrology can really help world leaders take better decisions is an open question, but astrology can often give a glimpse of a few common traits based on the most simple formula, that of the Sun Sign under which these leaders were born.
For instance, Hillary Clinton is a Scorpio and there is now a movement of women called ‘Scorpios for Hillary’ supporting her election campaign on the basis of her star sign because they believe she must possess the same well-known Scorpio traits as they do.
These include leadership qualities, ambition and determination. Scorpios like to be in control and possess that famous withering Scorpio sting.
So if some Americans are looking at a new novel way to elect their President – and well they might given their recent track record – then astrology is as good a way as any because let’s face it, presidential candidates are just selling an image anyway – an image that never lives up to the reality.
What of the main three Cypriot candidates then? Where are the ‘Leos for Kasoulides’, ‘Virgos for Christofias’, and ‘Capricorns for Papadopoulos’? What character traits would make any of them electable in an ideal world where such things really ought to count but don’t?
Tassos Papadopoulos
Capricorn
As a Capricorn, the sign of the goat, some of Papadopoulos’ traits would include ambition and authoritarianism. Capricorns take life very seriously, are hard working, goal oriented, status-conscious, and refuse to be bullied. They are also highly-sexed but ambition comes ahead of relationships, which they tend to approach in the old-fashioned way.
On the negative side, they can be self-centered, opinionated, moody and blunt. As one astrology site said: “They will live to a ripe old age just to spite everyone.”
“Capricorns are hopeless as comedians but make excellent undertakers, journalists and butchers,” it added. Other good career moves for Capricorns include business, engineering and construction or anything that involves wearing jackboots.
Papadopoulos shares his sun sign with such infamous world leaders as Joseph Stalin, Mao Tse Tung and Richard Nixon, and also Darth Vader.
On a more positive note, Joan of Arc, Humphrey Bogart, Isaac Newton and Martin Luther King were also Capricorns, so Cyprus might not be totally without hope.
Ioannis Kassoulides
Leo
Leo is always seen as one of the leadership signs of the Zodiac, so Kasoulides has a head start. Independent candidate Marios Matsakis is also a Leo.
Leos are said to have high standards and like being seen as a person of status. They like jet setting off to exciting places and being seen in the company of the rich and famous. They also love nice things, are fairly generous and loyal and on the whole optimistic.
On a bad day, Leos can be irritating and smug in their own arrogance and some Leos look on others as being beneath them. They love to be admired and praised but can be easily deceived by flattery. “If you are a dictator you might even invade somewhere,” said the astrologer at voiceofreason.com
The general consensus is that the ideal career for a Leo would be a position in the Royal Family, and failing that, a career in politics or film.
Kasoulides and Matsakis share the same sun sign with Bill Clinton, Fidel Castro, Slobodan Milosevic, Mussolini and Napoleon. Their saving grace is that Emily Bronte, Alfred Hitchcock Aldous Huxley and Carl Jung were also Leos. So is Madonna.
Demetris Christofias
Virgo
According to some astrologers, Virgos are among the most misunderstood signs of the zodiac because most people see them as anal nitpickers with a critical streak unmatched in the Zodiac.
But Virgos are said to be highly intelligent and like to keep themselves on the go. They also have a tendency towards martyrdom. They are witty and like good conversation and prefer to show how much they care with actions rather than words. They are also loyal to their friends.
However, Virgos also have a famous sarcastic streak that can reduce others to tears. “You have a need to pigeon hole people and will not accept people that cannot be categorised and put into a definable sub class or species,” wrote thevoiceofreason.com
As far as career moves are concerned, Virgos make great actors and chefs, accountants and teachers. Politics don’t get a mention.
Christofias is in good company with such Virgos as Mother Teresa, Richard Gere, Sophia Loren, Peter Falk and Mickey Mouse – and not a dictator in sight – although Cardinal Richelieu and Jesse James might not make it to the top of everyone’s list of favourite people.
Having astrologically perused what’s on offer as a new president, hopes for solving the Cyprus problem don’t seem very bright. What Cyprus needs is a nice Libra president whose analytical and diplomatic skills, easy-going manner and ability to listen, will simply charm the Turks into submission.
How could a Libra president fail when they share such enlightened company as Mahatma Ghandi, Charlie Brown, Buster Keaton, Groucho Marx, Desmond Tutu, Brigitte Bardot, and John Lennon?
And if being nice doesn’t work, it is only fair to remind the interlocutors that Heinrich Himmler was also a Libra.
So, after weighing up the astrological options it is clear that Cyprus must vote either for me, the Coffeeshop’s Patroclos or… DISY boss Nicos Anastassiades.
