EXCUSE us for not sharing the moral outrage of our holier than thou politicians over the apostasy of DIKO deputy Zacharias ‘Judas’ Koulias, but it is very difficult to understand what the fuss is all about.
Koulias was not caught passing state secrets to the Turks, he did not sexually assault a hotel cleaner, he did not expose himself outside a primary school, he was not the recipient of bribes from big business, he was not running a brothel and he did not agree to 50,000 Turkish settlers staying on after a settlement.
If he had done any of the above the insane knee-jerk reactions and rampant moralising may have been understandable but apostasy is not even a civil offence in our country. And his action did not exactly have any devastating consequences for our society, like the incompetent management of the economy by our government is having. Nobody has lost his home or job as a result of Koulias’ decision to vote for Yiannakis Omirou in Thursday’s first session of the new House.
The only consequence was that Marios Lafazayian failed to get re-elected to the House presidency which was a great personal tragedy for him – as he lost his chauffeur-driven limo, his dozen bodyguards, his mega-salary, whopping expense allowance and his high social/political status – but not for anyone else, with the possible exception of his lovely wife.
In fact, for non-Akelites last Thursday’s House session was a thoroughly enjoyable day, proving that Cyprus politics can be fun when there is an apostate around, wrecking the well-plotted plans of his morally superior colleagues.
MOST POLITICIANS of the AKEL-DIKO axis turned into teachers of morality as they took turns to condemn Koulias’ immoral behaviour.
DIKO deputy and pharmacist Athena Kyriakidou, took Marios’ defeat very personally jeering Koulias in the House and calling him a ‘Judas’. After the election of Omirou when she was less hysterical she said: “A Judas was needed to betray Christ and a Koulias to betray DIKO.”
She was more hysterical the following day on the morning radio shows, but stuck to the biblical imagery. “Judas received 30 pieces of silver. I do not know what Koulias’ 30 pieces of silver were.”
DIKO also issued a statement censuring the deputy, who will be expelled from the party on Tuesday. “Nothing can wash away the stain left by the behaviour and choices of Mr Koulias on the political life of the country, the standing and prestige of the Republic.”
But despite grief and sadness that had seized the party of high principles over the indelible stain on political life, we are happy to report it did not lose its sense of humour. Responding to Koulias’ comments, it said: “Unless he has decided, from being an apostate and champion of the corruption of public life, to turn into its court jester.”
WHAT I cannot understand is why DIKO cannot accept Koulias’ explanation that his decision not to vote for Lafazayian, was dictated by his principles. DIKO and especially its leader, who have always lived by their principles, should have been a little more understanding of Koulias.
He stayed true to his principles, like a true DIKO member, and put them above everything, even if this meant expulsion from his party and alienating his comrades. Koulias should have been applauded by his party for following moral teachings of his leader Lafazayian, who back in 2009 said: “When it comes to matters of principle or issues relating to the survival of the country, no chair interests me, no public post and no spoil.”
THIS establishment was never a great fan of Koulias, a political nut-case of the first order, but his apostasy turned him into a folk hero and we were cheering him on when it became apparent that he would wreck communist plans to re-elect the AKEL poodle as House president.
And despite his loony nationalist politics – a nasty bash-patriot with a vicious tongue – he is a laugh. On Friday he gave a news conference to silence his detractors and show the rest of us that he is on the way to becoming a legend in his own life-time.
Regarding his two biggest critics within his party, he said: “AKEL has a branch within DIKO, with (Limassol deputy Angelos) Votsis as the abbot and Athena Kyriakidou as the laments-crier. The way these two were expressing themselves and howling you’d think someone had killed their children.”
AS REGARDS his party boss, he accused him of openly urging DIKO supporters not to vote for Koulias because he was a rejectionist. He took his hat off to Lafazayian for doing this openly. Describing the clash he also resorted to biblical imagery.
“The voters of DIKO chose Koulias and did not allow Marios Garoyian to banish me. It was a beautiful clash of the titans – he the president of the House and leader of DIKO against the refugee deputy. We fought a clean and fair contest, David against Goliath, and unfortunately he was hit by David’s sling-shot.”
The ‘titan’ Koulias is four feet 11 inches tall, which would qualify him for the title of the ‘malignant dwarf’, if he had not become a folk hero.
AT LEAST DIKO had embarked on its morality lessons only after Lafazayian had lost the House presidency. The Akelites have been giving sermons all week, telling everyone how they could become more moral and virtuous.
As the self-declared virgins of Cyprus politics, the commies were apoplectic about the hideous new “customs introduced to political life by DISY” which had proved “inconsistent and untrustworthy” in constantly changing its stance with regard to the election of the House president.
The virginal comrade Stavros Evagorou castigated the morally deficient DISY leadership for which “the end justifies the means”. For the sanctimonious comrades it was outrageous that “objectives are placed above principles and not principles above objectives,” said Evagorou who tried to teach DISY how to make political alliances.
“As AKEL we insist that any alliances must be based on principles and aim at serving the interests of Cyprus and the Cypriot people.”
The DIKO-AKEL alliance, for instance, was based on the principles of electing comrade Tof president and Lafazayian House president for two terms. It also included the principle of first class, all expenses-paid foreign travel to any destination for Marcos Kyprianou and his bodyguard.
IT WAS NOT only DISY who failed to live to the high moral standards set by our commie rulers. Comrade Tof had a go at Archbishop Chrys from Down Under last Monday, announcing that the Church had no right to interfere in politics.
This was part of the concerted Akelite onslaught on Chrys, when the comrades suspected that he was encouraging David not to vote for Goliath. “The priests have their weakness,” announced the comrade in Australia and added. “The cloth does not make the priest, you must also have content.”
HIS VIEWS about what makes a priest, were not widely reported Down Under, and the reporter of The Australian newspaper, Greg Sheridan, who attended his news conference, was very impressed with the comrade.
In his report Sheridan wrote, “Christofias is certainly the most agreeable communist I have ever met” and flatteringly concludes it with the punch-line, “If only all the world’s communists were like him.”
The report also includes a rather worrying bit of information, to which all our bash-patriots should have been alerted. The “charming Christofias” wrote Sheridan is “a very good friend of former Australian foreign minister Alexander Downer.” It gets worse.
The comrade is quoted as saying that “There are forces which criticise Downer but I do not agree with those forces.”
Why has he never said this while in Kyproulla and his DIKO allies were baying for Big Bad Al’s blood?
EVERYONE is wondering what would happen to the 10 hangers-on that were hired on a contractual basis by Lafazayian when he was House president in order to run his errands and make sure that the rusfeti requests that came to his office were dealt with in a principled way.
Apart from this, the guys occasionally dusted and tidied up Marios’ principles. Will the new House president Omirou keep them on, or will he replace them with EDEK-supporting unemployables?
On Thursday morning Lafazayian, knowing that he would lose the afternoon vote, went into his office and took away all his flower-pots, but left behind all the ones that were being paid by the taxpayer, in order to make him feel important.
SPEAKING of the House, there was more bad news for its former director Costakis Christoforou, who was appointed unconstitutionally, by the comrade as President of the Commission for the Protection of Competition.
Politis did a search of his ‘legal studies’ degree and found that it was issued by a dodgy establishment in the US, the degrees of which, the American government did not recognise. His degree was not recognised by the Cyprus authority either, which meant that he became director of the legislature without having a university degree, a requirement for the post.
But the comrade liked Costakis so much that he arranged an extension of service for him after he reached retirement age. And then he put him in charge of the Competition Commission, without him having any proper, legal qualifications – hence the fiasco with the fines of the petrol companies.
The only qualification required to get appointed to a top post in Kyproulla under the reds, is a degree in flattery of the great leader.
INCIDENTALLY, before retiring from the legislature, the cunning Costakis made sure both his daughters landed well-paid state jobs. One daughter, a graphic designer was hired at the House of Representatives. The requirements for the job were tailor-made so that his daughter would be hired.
What need the legislature had of an in-house graphic designer nobody knows, but who could blame Costakis for wanting to secure a job for his daughter at his family business. The other daughter is employed at the State Legal Services. At least her law degree is kosher.
THE FITCH downgrade arrived last week, but before it was announced our good friend Charilaos showed his genius for political spin when he told reporters the following: “We must be careful as to how we interpret (downgrades) and the impression we create. If three rating agencies have downgraded us twice in a year, it does not mean we have been downgraded 6 times.” So many times does it mean we were downgraded?
I have a question for Charilaos which I will try to get him to answer. If two agencies downgrade us once in a year and a third downgrades three times, how many times would this mean we were downgraded?
WE ARE RUNNING out of space so we may as well say it. Three cheers for the titan Koulias who not only slayed Goliath last Thursday, but he handed a much deserved defeat to our commie rulers.
