OFF TO the English School, the latest victim of the siege mentality and spirit of intolerance, which has swept the plantation ever since our belligerent Ethnarch and the Commissar decided to declare a war of words against the evil foreign powers.
There is now a small but vociferous clique of fundamentalist parents and teachers, who want Turkish Cypriot students kicked out and the school to be turned into an institution, exclusively for Greek Orthodox kids. While the board has resisted this loony fringe, there are fears that if a few populist, bash-patriotic politicians take up this crusade, the school’s proud, 100-year tradition as an educational centre which promoted tolerance and open-mindedness could be at serious risk.
The latest crisis was sparked by the headmaster’s decision to allow a representative of Gideons International, the missionary group which distributes bibles all over the world, to speak to the kids during the morning assembly. When the Gideon rep began to speak, seven students walked out in protest, believing that this was a Protestant attempt to proselytise them.
The headmaster, quite rightly, considered this a breach of discipline and blatant mark of disrespect for a school guest and suspended the seven students. The issue went much deeper – if the students had not learned to show respect for other people’s beliefs and views, which is part of the school ethos, they had learned nothing.
The fact is that there was no attempt at proselytising; the guest spoke about the Christian teaching of ‘love thy neighbour’ and did not go into any interpretation of religious dogma. The rep then offered free copies of Gideon’s Bible to any student who wanted one.
Ironically, none of the Turkish Cypriot students present protested, and neither had their parents who had been informed by the Parents’ Association about the talk by the Gideon rep.
INCENSED by the suspensions of their precious kids for heroically standing up for religious intolerance and Orthodox fundamentalism, the parents went to the other bastion of free speech, Simerini, to report the headmaster. The story was tailor-made for the paper, which has become not only the arbiter of patriotic correctness, but also the chief peddler of paranoid xenophobia.
Here was an English headmaster allowing Protestant missionaries to proselytise Greek Orthodox kids and suspending seven of them for putting up brave resistance to this heinous plot. This was the how the paper reported the story on its front page some 10 days ago. Another report followed the next day, saying that Gideons received millions of bucks from the US government, as if this were a bad thing in itself. It stopped short of suggesting this was another plot by the Yanks to impose the A-plan.
Meanwhile, some deputies, at the behest of parents, picked up the issue and begun applying pressure on the board to force the head to rescind the suspensions of the seven students. The parents also recruited the support of a group of bash-patriotic teachers, as they demanded that the school become the exclusive preserve of Greek Orthodox kids.
These religious fundamentalists suddenly realised that all the Orthodox icons which had once adorned the walls of every classroom had been taken down, on the orders of the school’s Senior Management Team. Hardly surprising, considering there is a sizeable number of Turkish Cypriot kids attending the school at present.
The supporters of ethnic purity at the school demanded that the religious icons be hung up again and argued that the Turkish Cypriots be kicked out so that the English School could be declared Greek Orthodox school. They would have agreed to Turkish Cypriots staying if they embraced the Orthodox faith.
This may sound absurd but stupider things have been suggested for the school. At one point, deputies had proposed that the school should be turned into a Greek school, because it was outrageous for the government to subsidise an English-language school. Presumably it would have been called the ‘Greek-speaking English School’.
THE ORTHODOX fundamentalist parents were demanding that the headmaster make a public apology to their kids and rescinded the punishment. They threatened to take the matter to the television stations and newspapers if the public apology did not materialise. They even got politicians to call and put pressure on individual school governors, threatening to take the persecution of Orthodox kids to the House Education Committee.
Board members knew that these guys were not kidding and that a public row would prompt politicians to meddle in school affairs, which would ultimately harm the school. On the other hand, they could not subject the headmaster to the humiliation of apologising for punishing students for violating school rules and showing contempt for the school’s traditional values of religious tolerance and respect for other views.
The board eventually, gave in to the Orthodox zealots, because, in these intolerant times of patriotic hysteria, humiliating the headmaster was an easier option than having to deal with loony, populist politicians. While the board agreed that the headmaster had the right to punish students for breaches of school discipline, he would withdraw the punishment of the seven because it was over a sensitive issue.
AND NOW for the sermon of the day: parents who want their kids to go to a Greek Orthodox school with Orthodox icons on classroom walls, which has no tolerance for other religions and beliefs and where they would not have to mix with Muslim Turkish Cypriots, should send them to a state gymnasium. Is it that difficult for them to realise that the English School is not the school for them?
At a gymnasium, their kids will be taught in the language of Greek Orthodoxy and not in English. And the same goes for the fundamentalist teachers. If they do not like the liberal ethos of the school and the presence of Turks, why do they not find a job at a school where their narrow-mindedness and chauvinism would be viewed as positive educational attributes?
STAYING on education issues, Commissar Christofias has embarked on a charm offensive against hapless school students. Two weeks ago he arranged for students to visit the legislature where the unrepentant Stalinist spoke to the kids about the importance of democracy.
He told the visiting group: “The objective of education is to teach children the democratic way of thinking and behaviour, turning them into free and responsible personalities, into active citizens.” Schools should protect the student from “the dangers of fanaticism and sterile dogmatism,” he told the kids. When a dogmatic communist who does not allow any Akelite to disagree with his views castigates “sterile dogmatism”, you know that words have lost their meaning.
As part of the Commissar’s effort to strengthen democratic thinking at our schools, 100,000 envelopes, paid for by the taxpayer, will be distributed to all students of primary and secondary schools. Each envelope contains two exercise books, three bookmarks, a writing pad, and a timetable grid.
It also contains a personal message from the Commissar, who did not miss the opportunity to promote himself to tomorrow’s voters. Such democratic practices promoting the great leader to kids are widespread in Cuba and North Korea.
I WONDER if he mentioned his new slogan about Britain being “our bad demon” in his message to the kids? The Commissar pilloried the British demon while in London last weekend and did the same on his return to the plantation on Monday. The Ethnarch did exactly the same on his return from a state visit to Hungary on Tuesday, endorsing his co-presidente’s jibe.
Are our politicians not afraid that these comments could cause problems for our plantation? If the two-faced Brits wanted, they could wreck our economy which is dependent, to a large extent, on tourism from the UK. I am almost beginning to suspect that there is some silent understanding between Nicosia and London on the issue of abusing the duplicitous Brits and their policies on the Cyprob.
Our politicians have licence to say whatever they like with impunity, so long as the presence of the British bases is never questioned or challenged. It is an arrangement that suits both sides perfectly.
OUR BRAVE politicians though tread much more carefully when it comes to the Yanks’ policies on Cyprus, which are exactly the same as those of the Brits. On Friday, the Yanks announced that representatives of 10 US companies would be arriving in the pseudo-state this week in order to set up shop and to help its economic development. The US government is still exploring ways to of setting up direct flights to the north.
This surely makes them eligible for some vitriolic abuse by our brave politicians, but the reaction by the government has been muted, to say the least. We can only guess that they are afraid to express themselves publicly, because the new US administration is not like the Brits. There is a danger it might take the abuse seriously. New Secretary of State Condoleeza Rice is no Colin Powell and our politicians seem to have understood that she is a mean operator.
SMOOTH-TALKING Commerce and Industry Minister George Lillikas was particularly careful in his comments about the plans of the US companies. Lillikas who has a similar talent to the Ethnarch in making the most ludicrously idiotic argument sound almost serious, said there was nothing to worry about from the arrival of the US companies.
The reason was that these companies already sold their products in the south and would not jeopardise their sales here in order to sell a few products in the north! He may be the commerce minister, but he obviously, has not been informed that for an American company the Cyprus market is less than tiny. For these US companies, it is Turkey’s market which matters and they would be more than happy to jeopardise sales of their in the plantation, in order to strengthen their presence there.
KOFI ANNAN infuriated our Ethnarch on Thursday night when, responding to a question by a Bananiot hack in London about a new UN initiative on the Cyprob, he urged Tassos to put in writing the changes he wanted to the A-plan.
Tassos got Cyprus Goldenmouth to call up all the TV news shows on Thursday evening to say that Annan was essentially talking nonsense. All the changes we wanted were included in the letter Tassos had sent him in June last year, said Cyprus, in an attempt to fool the viewers. In that letter he had made general critique of the plan and the De Soto team, but he never spelt out what changes would make the plan acceptable.
Aware that people would begin to ask questions, the Ethnarch went on the offensive accusing Annan’s statement of not being objective, as he had not asked the Turkish side to make written proposals about changes it wanted. This is another one of those ludicrously idiotic arguments that would sound serious to someone who has been lobotomised. The Turkish side accepted the plan, so why would it write to Annan proposing changes? It is Tassos who claims he wants changes.
Don’t be surprise if in a couple of weeks Tassos sends the UN a 500-page document containing all the changes he wants, and then accusing Annan of not taking his proposals seriously. He’s done it before.
SPEAKING on CyBC yesterday morning, Lillikas, attacked all those locals who accuse our Ethnarch of not wanting a solution as they were doing a disservice to the country. Foreigners would use these accusations, he said, to claim we do not want a settlement. This is another classic example of the ludicrously idiotic argument with a serious ring. Sure, if we refrained from saying that Tassos does not want a settlement all the foreigners would think that he sincerely wants a solution.
I think the most offensive feature of this government is its assumption that it is running a country of lobotomised village idiots who will believe anything.
PROFESSOR Andreas Theophanous, the self-proclaimed “ideological father of the ‘no’ campaign” appears to have taken great offence from our item, published two weeks ago, about his great talent for self-promotion. His sanctimonious letter to the editor, published last Sunday, was a classic of the ‘martyrdom genre’, which more and more of our ‘freedom fighters’ are resorting to whenever they face any kind of criticism.
The melodramatic, “I am being attacked because of my heroic opposition to the Annan plan,” line of defence is wearing rather thin as a result of excessive use – (Madsakis, Tttooulis, Lillikas to mention a few). Something a little more original and witty would have been in order from an intellectual heavyweight like the professor. He could have attributed the remarks to envy of his prolific writing, his intellectual standing, his job, his good looks but it had to be to his precious “political positions and ideological beliefs” about which this establishment does not give a damn.
As he so correctly put it in his letter, we practise a low level of journalism that relies on comments overheard in lobbies of hotels and we do not cross-check our sources. The question is why such a prominent figure of our intelligentsia took offence to something written in a contemptible gossip column? Despite this, he has not denied what was overheard in the hotel lobby – that he described himself as the “ideological father of the ‘no’ campaign”.
Nevertheless, we owe the professor an apology and would like to put the record straight. In our item of two weeks ago, we referred to him as the ‘Director of the Intercollege Research Institute’, which we now realise was not his correct title. He is ‘Director General’ of the Research and Development Center at Intercollege. Once again, we apologise for referring to him as a mere director and would like to assure the Director-general that next time we refer to him we will cross-check his titles, but not our sources.
DIRECTOR-GENERAL Professor Theophanous did not miss the opportunity to publicise his book, The Cyprus Question and the EU: The Challenge and the Promise in his letter. I accepted the ideological father’s challenge to have a look at his book and must say that he is hardly qualified to pass judgment on anyone’s impartiality. I promise to review the book in next week’s edition.
