IT’S MY front door buzzer. A courier looking like a soaked black spaceman is at the door. He asks me to sign for a parcel, while his radio controller is making a crackling sound in the background, and then disappears into the cold, snowy street.
I open the parcel: it’s a men’s deodorant. I am reviewing the latest men’s fragrances for Ice Magazine, and right now my flat smells of freshly sprayed men. After spray number six feeling quite light-headed (I guess men’s deodorants are potent for a reason), I open the window and go for a stroll for some fresh air.
But on the floor outside the main door to the building there is a piece of paper addresses to me: It’s from DHL. “We tried to deliver a parcel but you were out.” But I wasn’t, I have been waiting in ESPECIALLY for this latest limited edition deodorant to arrive. It was sent by DHL because we thought the post couldn’t be relied upon, but little did we know…
So I go back into the apartment, which still smells of freshly-showered rugby players and call the number on the piece of paper. After carefully following several options on my handset which the automated operator asks me to do, I am asked to tap in my 12-digit number but then I am put on hold. For a long time. The phone rings and rings, but every so often the taped voice of an operator reassures me that I am an important customer and WILL be addressed shortly.
It’s cunning but it works, as I almost feel like I just spoke to someone. Finally there is a live human voice at the other end of the phone and my hope in the human race is restored. She takes my details and I hear her tapping them into their system for an early delivery the next morning.
So, once again, I leave my flat, and this time the exit is uneventful.
My next mission today is to check out the latest summer high-street collections from Miss Selfridge. Their invite is a pretty floral print which is very summery indeed, but I struggle to get into the mood as I walk in the snow.
Summer really feels like an eternity away. At Miss Selfridge I am offered a cocktail and after taking off my parka jacket, big scarf, hat and gloves I am ready to take notes. I catch up on the gossip – apparently Beyoncé, Mystique and Jamelia were spotted in the Oxford Street store recently.
The collections are fab. Pastel sugary colours are all the rage, and my two favourite looks – Lolita (a flashback to the styles and influences of the 30s and 40s) and Madam Butterfly (soft, fluid and oriental influences mixing kimono styles with kaftans, tunics and low backs) are very feminine and sexy at the same time. In terms of colour palettes, it’s official: this summer ‘lemon sorbet’ shade of yellow is the new black! I say my goodbyes and apologise for my casual appearance due – of course – to such severe weather conditions.
“Don’t be silly,” the press officer replies, “you look fab, you’re a stylist ‘doing snow’!”
All these sugary colours have left me with a sweet tooth and the freezing temperatures make me long for a good old-fashioned bubble bath. On my way home I put both wishes together and treat myself to a new product I spotted the other day in Debenhams, it’s called ‘It…is Sweet’: a new bath and body range devised by Patsy Palmer and close friend Charlotte Cutler. Based on the power of sugarcane as used by the women of the South Pacific two millennia ago, this range is delicious and mouth watering. I go for the ‘It’s brown sugar babe’ bath creme and the ‘It is demerara delight’ body lotion. To die for…
Back at home I step into the bath and there I am, transported by the magic of scent, in a lemon-sorbet bathing suit on a warm sandy beach!
When I get out I put on my track suit and pop out to the corner shop for some ice cream. After all, a girl can dream!
Miss Selfridge:www.missselfridge.com
It’s… Sweet: priced £4.99 stockists enquiries: 01344 390 555
