It’s not Sunday without Patroclos

Sir,
Trades Descriptions Act: an edition of the Sunday Mail (December 28) that does not include the Coffeeshop by Patroclos cannot, inter alia and ipso facto, be considered to be a legal copy of the said Sunday Mail.

If this occurs again, I will have to send the boy round. Please ensure that this omission is not repeated.
I.M. Wotchingoo, Paphos
Patroclos returns next Sunday, January 11